i used to write lengthy entries in these virtual pages.
i used to read hundreds of pages of books.
i used to observe people, their behaviors, their relationships with others.
i used to paint.
i used to dance.
i used to do a lot of things.
looking back to last year, i was changing slowly. 2009 was such a rollercoaster ride. so many things happened. good and bad. fun and not so fun.
in the last few days, i've been reflecting a lot.
i've been looking back to the past, wondering at what point I did I become so unhappy?
it seems impossible that I became so depressed over a short period of time.
in the last few days, i've been getting in touch with my own feelings.
accepting every single one I'm experiencing. and trying to find its source. slowly mending it little by little.
things are getting better. i'm taking baby steps, one day at a time.
i'm telling myself to be brave, to have faith and make the changes i need to make.
and giving myself the love that i deserve.
3 comments:
Meta...
how're you? hope things are getting better :). I remembered those though days when I kept telling myself to be brave too and to hold on to my faith. Even sometimes being on my own & far away from home...I have no choice besides to be strong. And I have faith in you...always know you as a strong and optimist lady :). I know you will dance,paint, read books again...and do way more things that you can think of. Stay strong yah...thinking about you :)
Jeremiah 29:11
- Mitriya-
meta, hope u are holding up !!!
be strong and just do what you love... because it is the only way to define happiness,,, nothing else matters!
take your time, it will help
dude. this is kinda hilarious. I haven't been to my blog (from 2005) in a long time, and when I did today, I saw your comments to my most childish entry.
I don't think you're depressed. It is just so much more difficult when there is constant reflection in life. We ARE changing. I have always felt like I can escape age- that i'm beyond growing old. I feel old. and I feel like things are not going right.
but hey. maybe acceptance is not the only answer. maybe change is :)
where are you? we're so close (i think 6 hours away is pretty close) lets hang out and reflect on life :)
i'll be down in LA maybe the first week on March (ish). lets catch up.
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